| Wednesday, May 25, 2005 |
| CC recap |
our very solid small group
I'm still trying to take things in and really reflect on what happened this past weekend. At the very least, I leave this conference very blessed with a feeling that I am a part of something special and exciting for the days to come. I have a renewed hope that God's working on something big in our campuses. And it all starts with repentance. For me this meant coming to the cross and laying down my sins of selfishness and hypocrisy: trying to negotiate between living for Me and God. So all there's left to do now is to surrender my life, my ambitions, my dreams for His sake. Now the act of attempting to surrender my life to Him isn't necessarily new to me, but it's been a while, and for some reason, it's not accompanied by the feeling of loss and sacrifice of something I'm trying to hold on to as I've felt in the past. In its place is an understanding and hope that what He has planned is infinitely greater than my own plans.
And to a large extent, that's what this weekend was all about: Students and workers coming to that realization that they must continue to die to their selves and with selfish ambitions out of the way, seeking out his direction and calling, praying for unity among the body of Christ.
I'm blown away by the sense of community that was fostered during the weekend. I'm blown away by the connection that was created in our small group, that we were able to share so freely with one another our struggles, our burdens, our joys as if we had all grown up together when for most of us, friday was the first time we met. I'm excited in what God has in store for our smallgroup and pray that we can continue to meet and pray for one another (i love you guys).
I'm excited for what God has in store in Queens (this summer and next year). I feel like a kid again
I think i'm going to leave it at that for now. Oh to be alive |
posted by DarrenGene @ 1:06 PM  |
|
|
| Monday, May 16, 2005 |
| my first nightmare in a long time |
i haven't had vivid dreams in a while, let alone nightmares, so i think i'll share it with you:
(Note: usually when I dream, a lotta things that really don't make sense in your waking state make sense or seem to make sense in the dream)
Okay, I'm not sure what time it is exactly but I'm in bed at night falling in and out of sleep when my door opens and in walks an important looking little man in a black suit (i recognize who he is, but i think he's just a figment of my imagination). He flicks on the light bringing me back to life, says nothing to me, and heads straight to my desk pulling open my drawings going through my stacks of papers. This brings me out of the bed and i go over to confront him. The look in his face tells me that he has found what he has been looking for as I watch him eyeballing my passport. He grabs it in one hand and attempts to run past me and out my door but i manage to catch him by the coat and turn him around. (Now here's where reason seems to fall out of place). As he struggles to break out of my hold, I come to the realization that this man is not just a man, but the fallen angel himself and suddenly, his agenda for breaking into my room becomes clear to me: Satan is trying to steal my identity as he has tried (but failed) in numerous other occassions. You see, Satan in my dreams, has the ability to take whatever form he likes buuut, given this superhuman ability, he lacks the ability to forge legal documents (he cannot produce proper identification of who he is trying to be). So as he has tried in the past to steal my driver's licence and my Queens photo ID (although I don't remember dreaming of any of this on other occasions), he is back for my passport. I get violent at this point knowing the sheer magnitude of the situation if Satan was to escape out of my doors with my passport. So there I am kicking, punching, and screaming for Satan to be gone in the middle of the night. With so much noise, I manage to wake up my dad who peeks into my room to see what all the commotion is about. This distration is all i need in order to wrestle my passport free and kick Satan down the stairs. My dad calmly walks over to my washroom after the struggle to (take a shower?) while I struggle to find a hiding place for my passport knowing that Satan will return. The passport finds a new home in a lonely sock as I run out of my room and look over the bannister to see where Satan is. And there he is, at the bottom of the stairs, but he has taken a new form and begins to morph nonstop into different people that I have met in my life (although I can't recollect who they are now) as he slowly begins the trek upstairs to where I am. I begin to start horking and tossing down mistimed loogies in his direction (this part is pretty believable because i have no control of where my spittle flies and falls...often down my shirt) and as he reaches the last step, we grapple, me versus me, except I'm (or he) is a lot stronger than I am and he overpowers me and pushes me into the washroom in which my dad is showering. So i'm in the washroom yelling for my dad to turn off the water and give his son a hand as Satan proceeds to start slapping me with these huge open-faced hands (his hands morphed but he's still me) demanding to know where I have hidden the passport. My dad, who is no longer my dad at this point because he has become someone else, continues on with his/her shower while I am beaten without mercy. It's right here in the story that I wake up. As I was posting in velsie's blog, it seems that I always wake up at the climax of my dreams. Well the good news is Satan didnt end up getting my passport. It's still in my top drawer in my desk. Better news yet is that my dad didn't come out of the shower naked to come save me. I think i'd might have some serious problems if that happened in my dream (phew). Peaaaaas! (as in peace no peter owen) |
| posted by DarrenGene @ 11:35 AM |
|
|
| Saturday, May 14, 2005 |
| my legs don't work |
so after two straight days of ball at the Y with pixelboardians, i decided to give the good old lower body a workout at good old goodlife. My legs were already a little sore from ball but i was thinking that it's been forever since i've given my legs a good old thrashing... and so i went to work performing squats, lunges, quad raises, hip abductor and adductor uhhh movements. And to be honest with you, immediately after, my legs still felt somewhat juiced and good to go, so before concluding the workout, i decided to work the abigail muscles on the leg raise crunch machine. And so i'm about to do my first set when a girl asks me if "i have many sets left?" to which i responded, "I just started, but u're welcome to work out with me" to which she responded, "great". So, i'm just about finished my set and i'm about to leap down off the machine since it's suspended in the air about a foot. I touch the ground, but my legs at this point completely give (i guess they weren't as "juiced" as i thought) and i fall forward almost into another guy working out across from me. The good thing is, the only thing that was hurt was my pride. The girl giggles a little and steps up to do her set while i limp off to get a drink of water. As I come back, she hops off the machine, mutters to me that "It's pretty hard, eh?" (in reference to the ab workout) to which i respond, "it was killer".
so, i get up on the machine and resume my set while she looks on and when i finish she jokingly remarks, "be careful this time, or you'll fall again". I get down carefully, watching my step and reply,"it happens all the time with me. Just can't seem to help it". She looks at me with a pouted look as she steps onto the machine: "That's a shame, because I have that problem too... I was hoping that maybe you could catch me, just in case i fall as well."... She kinda caught me off guard with this comment and so i stutter out the words, "N-N-No problemo.". I mean seriously now, who says that still? But luckily for me, she laughs (either at my comment or at my akward nervousness that was beginning to show). As she finishes her set she looks at me and surprise surprise, trips and falls into surprise surprise my arms. And it was like at that point, time just stopped ticking, there was no one else in the gym but the two of us. I looked deeply into her eyes and she looked deeply into mine and as our faces slowly inched closer together, my knees gave once again and we came crashing down onto the floor laughing. *sigh*
yeah so all of paragraph two was fictional, but to this day my legs still kill (it's been a day and a half now). peaas
Oh yeah, mixtape update: one quarter done. If it's 70 percent to pass the ump test than i guess my bootay is grasssss and CC is less than a week away! bye friends for now |
| posted by DarrenGene @ 5:29 PM |
|
|
| Sunday, May 08, 2005 |
| Annie are you ok? Are you ok, Annie? |
Leave Michael alone, we're robbing HIM of his innocence.
Spring has been great so far now that everyone's bizzacck from school. Had a fione week/end with friends from quizeens, the pixelboardians, longtime goodtime friends adamn and woo, and ETCBC Illuminators. Thanks friends =)
A project that I am currently working on right now is a summertime mixtape that doesn't fit into the cookie cutter hiphop mixtape circuit (with loud obnoxious background shoutouts coloured with the pleasant sound of gunshots every time a bass beat kicks in). I mean I love 50 cent-imental and little jonathan as much as the next (wo)man but what i really miss are the songs that dominated the airwaves back when I was at a more impressionable age. And toronto only got an urban radio station, what, in the last 5 years, so it was a hodgepodge of pop, rnb, rock, and whatever fits in between those edges that i listened to back in the day. The CHF1 morning show back in grades 3-6 was what my dad listened to (or tolerated) at the time on the drive to school from north york to aurora so, not surprisingly, easy listening pop and to a lesser extent, soft rock, is what i grew to love. So this mixtape which I'm currently compiling together and will publish online for ppl to grab (does anyone have webspace they're willing to share?) will pay tribute to many of those songs (note: they'll all be uptempo and very "wedding danceable"). I'm fortunate enuf to have stumbled upon a goldmine of records dating from the 60s-80s which include some of my faves of the time so hopefully i can string enuf of these gems for the tape.
Now here's where u come in: If there's a song u really want on the tape and i have it on vinyl, i'll try to put it on for u (but keep in mind the theme of this tape). Here's a list of songs which I've already included on the tape to give u an idea of what this might actually sound like:
Whitney Houston: I wanna dance with somebody
Madonna: Holiday
Michael Jackson: Smooth Criminal
And those are just some of the many goodies that'll be on here (with some bangers that are on the radio now: so i guess it's not a tribute tape in the pure sense). This'll be something that you, your mama, and your baby cousin can get down to.... Holliiiddaaaayyyy bum bum bum... bum bum...Celllleebbraattteee! |
| posted by DarrenGene @ 6:52 PM |
|
|
| Monday, May 02, 2005 |
| the unemployment club |
so i had an interview at tommy at 8:15 this morning and i was running the interview thru my head trying to find the answers for all of their possible questions. Here are a couple:
Q: So, why exactly do you want to work for Tommy Hilfiger?
Made up Answer: I grew up with Tommy for most of my teenage-adult life. Back in Junior High, I remember when the brand name was everything to me and now, I still love Tommy, although it's evolved somewhat from its preppie image to embrace different styles but at the same time, stayed true to its American roots. I love what Tommy stands for. It's about embracing all of the things we love about American culture. Although, I have limited experience in retail sales, I feel that this would be a good place to start given the impact that Tommy has made on my own life. =)
Real Answer: I would like to earn some extra money but at the same time exploit the employee discounts for your merchandise, but given that I won't be making all that much and will probably have to shell out a bit just to wear the proper attire on the job, I probably stand to make close to nothing, but hey, at least I get something good to put on the resume and get some nice clothes to wear too =)
Q: What are your weaknesses and how might they affect your job performance?
Made up Answer: I think I'm a highly self-motivated person and at times, this can work against me, especially working in a team-work setting. If people are not working according to my own standards, I will attempt to do the work for them. But I believe working in teamwork settings in the past few years with regards to my teaching experience in summer camp has taught me the importance of working together...motivating others towards the common goal rather than just trying to be the best myself.
Real Answer: I'm not really all that self motivated. I'm usually motivated to excel at something I'm really passionate about and enjoy doing. I am really amped, for example, for the latter part of this summer where I'll be back in summercamp working with the kids. I see working with kids as a very enriching job given that their enthusiasm is contagious and you actually get the chance to play a role in molding their lives and challenging their minds (well not necessarily academically cause it is just camp still). But I'm a little skeptical about me being highly motivated on this job. What kind of impact am I actually making by folding clothes and assisting in sales? So that's probably a huge potential problem if you actually decide to give me this job.
So upon further review, i decided not to go to my interview this morning. I decided that I don't wanna get a job this summer just for the sake of getting a job, and i don't wanna have to lie in my interviews and tell them I'll be available all summer when i know I'll be working at the church for the last two months... In all honesty, who is willing to train and hire somebody for two months? So, I am sitting comfortable with my jobless fate. I mean I have books to read and a correspondence course to do as well so I won't be bored out of my mind... but if anyone wants to chill or have fun, I believe I can free up sooommmmee time to play =) So here's to unemployment! (but hey if you do know somebody that needs temp work holla at your boy!) |
| posted by DarrenGene @ 11:25 AM |
|
|
|
| about me |
|
|
|
| Archives |
|
|
|
| Affiliates |
|
|
